by Muriel James and Dorothy Jongeward
You cannot teach a man anything. You can only help him discover it within himself.
--Galileo
你無(wú)法教會(huì)一個(gè)人任何事，你只能幫助他自己去發(fā)現(xiàn)。
--伽利略
"WINNERS AND LOSERS"
“勝利者與失敗者”
Each human being is born as something new, something that never existed before. He is born with what he needs to win at life. Each person in his own way can see, hear, touch, taste, and think for himself. Each has his unique potentials -- his capabilities and limitations. Each can be a significant, thinking, aware, and creatively productive person in his own right -- a winner.
每個(gè)人從出生的那一刻起，就作為一個(gè)嶄新的、從未存在過(guò)的面目出現(xiàn)。他生而具備了所有使他能在生活中取得勝利的一切。每個(gè)人都能夠以他自有的獨(dú)特方式去觀察，傾聽(tīng)，觸摸，品嘗和思考。每個(gè)人都擁有其獨(dú)一無(wú)二的潛質(zhì) -- 他的才能和他的局限。每個(gè)人都可行使其自己的權(quán)利，成為一個(gè)功勛卓著、善于思考、充滿(mǎn)覺(jué)悟和創(chuàng)新性的生產(chǎn)能力的人 -- 一位勝利者。
The words "winner" and "loser" have many meanings. When we refer to a person as a winner, we do not mean one who beats the other guy by winning over him and making him lose. To us, a winner is one who responds authentically by being credible, trustworthy, responsive, and genuine, both as an individual and as a member of a society. A loser is one who fails to correspond authentically. Mastin Buber expresses this idea as he retells an old story of a rabbi who on his death bed sees himself as a loser. The rabbi laments that, in the world to come, he will not be asked why he wasn‘t Moses, he will be asked why he wasn‘t himself.
“勝利者”和“失敗者”這兩個(gè)詞擁有很多含義。當(dāng)我們稱(chēng)一個(gè)人為勝利者時(shí)，并不是指那類(lèi)借助勝過(guò)對(duì)方并致使對(duì)方失敗而打倒他人的人。對(duì)我們而言，勝利者是那種無(wú)論作為個(gè)人還是社會(huì)成員，都能以一種可信任的，值得信賴(lài)的，負(fù)責(zé)任和真誠(chéng)的態(tài)度為人處世的人。失敗者則指那些未能做到誠(chéng)實(shí)可靠的人。Mastin Buber 在他轉(zhuǎn)述一則老故事時(shí)表達(dá)了這一觀點(diǎn)。那是一個(gè)關(guān)于一位拉比（譯者注: 希伯來(lái)文，含導(dǎo)師和精神領(lǐng)袖之意）在臨死前將自己視為失敗者的故事，故事中的拉比哀嘆說(shuō)：在即將到來(lái)的世界里，他將不會(huì)被詢(xún)問(wèn)他為何沒(méi)有成為摩西（譯者注: 舊約圣經(jīng)中希伯來(lái)人的先知，曾引領(lǐng)以色列人走出埃及，史稱(chēng)‘出埃及事’），而會(huì)被質(zhì)問(wèn)他為何沒(méi)有成為他自己。
Few people are one hundred percent winners or one hundred percent losers, It‘s a matter of degree. However, once a person is on the road to being a winner, his chances are greater for becoming even more so. This book is intended to facilitate the journey.
百分之百的勝利者和百分之百的失敗者都是罕見(jiàn)的，問(wèn)題在于程度的不同。盡管如此，一旦一個(gè)人踏上了勝利者的道路，他成為勝利者的機(jī)會(huì)將變得更大，這部專(zhuān)著的目的就在于方便這段勝利者的旅途。
"WINNERS"
“勝利者”
Winners have different potentials , Achievement is not the most important thing. Authenticity is. the authentic person experiences the reality of himself by knowing himself, being himself, and becoming a credible, responsive person. He actualizes his own unprecedented uiqueness and appreciates the uniqueness of others. (The common pronoun "he" refers to person of either sex except when "she" is definately applicable.)
勝利者們擁有不同的潛質(zhì)，成就并非最重要的東西，真正重要的是真誠(chéng)。真誠(chéng)的人通過(guò)了解自己，做回自己并成為一個(gè)誠(chéng)實(shí)可靠且負(fù)有責(zé)任心的人而體驗(yàn)到真實(shí)的自我。他不僅實(shí)現(xiàn)自身的史無(wú)前例的獨(dú)特品質(zhì)，還去欣賞其他人的獨(dú)特品質(zhì)（這里的‘他’指代任何性別的人，除非是在明確需要使用‘她’的場(chǎng)合）。
A winner is not afraid to do his own thinking and to use his own knowledge. He can separate facts from opinion and doesn‘t pretend to have all the answers. He listens to others, evaluates what they say, but comes to his own conclusions. While he can admire and respect other people, he is not totally defined, bound, or awed by them.
勝利者不會(huì)為做出自己的思考和運(yùn)用自己的知識(shí)而感到不安。他能夠區(qū)分事實(shí)和觀點(diǎn)，而且并不裝作了解所有答案。他會(huì)傾聽(tīng)別人，評(píng)價(jià)他們所說(shuō)的話，但最終卻會(huì)得出自己的結(jié)論。他能夠贊賞和尊敬其他人，但又不會(huì)對(duì)那些人敬畏到固步自封。
A winner can be spontaneous. He does not have to respond in predetermined, rigid ways. He can change his plans when the situation calls for it. A winner has a zest for life. He enjoys work, play, food, other people, and the world of nature. Without guilt he enjoys his own accomplishments. Without envy he enjoys the accomplishments of others.
勝利者可能是自發(fā)的，他們用不著以一種預(yù)先規(guī)定的刻板的方式行動(dòng)，能在形勢(shì)需要時(shí)改變自己的計(jì)劃。勝利者對(duì)生活別有興味，他能夠享受工作，娛樂(lè)，美食，他人和整個(gè)自然界。他能問(wèn)心無(wú)愧地欣賞自己的成就，也能不帶妒忌地欣賞他人的成就。
Although a winner can freely enjoy himself, he can also postpone enjoyment. He can discipline himself in the present to enhance his enjoyment in the future. He is not afraid to go after what he wants but does so in appropriate ways. He does not get his security by controlling other.
盡管勝利者能夠自由地享受自我，他也能推遲享樂(lè)。為了加強(qiáng)未來(lái)的快樂(lè)，他可以在當(dāng)前約束自己。他并不害怕追求他想要的東西，但會(huì)以合適的方式去追求。此外，他不會(huì)通過(guò)控制別人來(lái)獲取自己的安全感。
A winner cares about the world and its peoples. He is not isolated from the general problems of society. He is concerned, compassionate and committed to improving the quality of life. Even in the face of national and international adversity, he does not see himself as totally powerless. He does what he can to make the world a better place.
勝利者關(guān)注整個(gè)世界和世界上的所有人，他不會(huì)與普遍性的社會(huì)問(wèn)題相隔絕。他關(guān)注社會(huì)，充滿(mǎn)同情心并且致力于改善生活的質(zhì)量。即使面對(duì)民族乃至國(guó)際的災(zāi)禍，也不會(huì)視自己為無(wú)能為力的人，而是會(huì)盡自己所能讓世界變得更美好。
"LOSERS"
“失敗者”
Although people are born to win, they are also born helpless and totally dependent on their environment. Winners successfully make the transition from total helplessness to independence, and then to interdependence. Losers do not. Somewhere along the line they begin to avoid becoming self-responsible.
盡管人們生來(lái)就可以取得勝利，他們?cè)诔跎畷r(shí)依然是無(wú)助的，完全依賴(lài)著其周邊的環(huán)境。勝利者能夠成功地從完全的無(wú)助和依賴(lài)逐漸走向獨(dú)立，并進(jìn)一步走向互惠的依賴(lài)，失敗者卻不然，他們會(huì)在從事一件事的中途某處開(kāi)始逃避自我，不肯變?yōu)閷?duì)自己負(fù)責(zé)的人。
As we have noted, few people are total winners or losers. Most of them are winners in some areas of their lives and losers in others. Their winning or losing is influenced by what happens to them in childhood.
正如我們已經(jīng)提到過(guò)的，很少有人是完全的勝利者或失敗者，他們中大多數(shù)是自己生活中部分領(lǐng)域的勝利者和其它領(lǐng)域的失敗者，他們的成敗受童年時(shí)代發(fā)生在他們身上的事情所影響。
A lack of response to dependency needs, poor nutrition, brutality, unhappy relationships, disease, continuing disappointments, inadequate physical care, and traumatic events are among the many experiences that contribute to making people losers. Such experiences interrupt, deter, or prevent the normal progess toward autonomy and self-actualization. To cope with negative experiences a child learns to manipulate himself and others. These manipulative techniques are hard to give up later in life and often become set patterns. A winner works to shed them. A loser hangs on to them.
渴望依靠的需要沒(méi)有得到足夠的回應(yīng)，營(yíng)養(yǎng)的缺乏，粗暴的行為，不愉快的關(guān)系，疾病，持續(xù)的情緒低落，不充足的身體關(guān)愛(ài)和創(chuàng)傷性的事件是使人成為失敗者的諸多體驗(yàn)中的一部分。這樣的體驗(yàn)或打斷，或威懾，或阻撓了人們走向自治和自我實(shí)現(xiàn)的過(guò)程。為了應(yīng)對(duì)這些負(fù)面的體驗(yàn)，兒童學(xué)會(huì)了操縱自己和他人，這種操縱技巧在日后的生活中很難被戒除，通常會(huì)成為既定的行為模式。勝利者會(huì)努力卸下它們，失敗者卻會(huì)抓住它們不放。
A loser represses his capacity to express spontaneously and appropriately his full range of possible behavior. He may be unaware of other options for his life if the path he chooses goes nowhere. He is afraid to try new things. He maintains his own status quo. He is a repeater. He repeats not only his own mistakes, he often repeats those of his family and culture.
失敗者抑制自己的能力，不讓它們自發(fā)而適當(dāng)?shù)乇磉_(dá)出自己全部可能的行為。若他選擇的生活路徑走不通，他很可能意識(shí)不到其它可行的選項(xiàng)。他會(huì)選擇安于現(xiàn)狀，做一位重復(fù)者，不僅重復(fù)他自身的錯(cuò)誤，還經(jīng)常會(huì)重復(fù)屬于他的家庭和文化圈子的錯(cuò)誤。
A loser has difficulty giving and receiving affection. He does not enter into intimate, honest direct relationships with others. Instead, he tries to manipulate them into living up to his expectations and channels his energies into living up to their expectations.
失敗者難以給予和接受感情，他不肯與別人形成親密而真誠(chéng)的直接關(guān)系，相反他會(huì)嘗試操縱他們，讓他們變得符合自己的期望，同時(shí)將自己的精力投注在努力符合他們的期望的過(guò)程中。
When a person wants to discover and change his "losing streak," when he wants to become more like the winner he was born to be, he can use gestalt-type experiments and transactional analysis to make change happen. These are two new exciting, psychological approaches to human problems. The first was given new life by Dr. Frederick Perls; the second was developed by Dr. Eric Berne.
當(dāng)一個(gè)人希望發(fā)現(xiàn)并改變自己的“失敗傾向”時(shí)，當(dāng)他希望變得更像他生來(lái)就可成就的勝利者時(shí)，他可以使用格式塔實(shí)驗(yàn)（譯者注: 格式塔為德語(yǔ)中‘形成’之意，這里指形成一個(gè)有組織的整體的體驗(yàn)。格式塔派心理學(xué)家于 1912 年提出了心理現(xiàn)象理應(yīng)是完整而不可分割之整體的理論）和相互作用分析來(lái)促使改變的發(fā)生。這是兩種全新的，激動(dòng)人心的解決人類(lèi)問(wèn)題的心理學(xué)手法，前者由 Frederick Perls 博士創(chuàng)立，后者由 Eric Berne 博士提出。
Perls was born in Germany in 1893 and left the country when Hitler came into power. Berne was born in Montreal in 1910. Both men were trained as Freudian psychoanalysts; both broke away from the use of orthodox psychoanalysis; both found their greatest popularity and acceptance in the United States.
Perls 于 1893 年生于德國(guó)，在希特勒?qǐng)?zhí)政后離開(kāi)祖國(guó)，Berne 于 1910 年生于蒙特利爾。兩人都曾被訓(xùn)練為弗洛伊德精神分析師，卻雙雙與正統(tǒng)的精神分析方法分道揚(yáng)鑣，兩個(gè)人都在美國(guó)得到了廣泛的聲譽(yù)和認(rèn)可。
Gestalt therapy is not new. However, its current popularity has grown very rapidly since it was given new impetus and direction by Dr. Frederick Perls. Gestalt is a german word for which there is no exact English equivalent; it means, roughly, the forming of an organized, meaningful whole.
格式塔療法并不是新事物。然而，其受歡迎程度卻隨著 Frederick Perls 博士的推動(dòng)取得了快速的發(fā)展。格式塔是德語(yǔ)中的詞匯，在英語(yǔ)中沒(méi)有精確的對(duì)應(yīng)詞，它的意思大體上是：一個(gè)有組織的，有意義的整體的形成。
Perls perceives many personalities as lacking wholeness, as being fragmented. He claims people are often aware of only parts of themselves rather than of the whole self. For example, a woman may not know or want to admit that sometimes she acts like her mother; a man may not know or admit that sometimes he wants to cry like a baby.
Perls 將許多人格特征視為缺乏整體性或殘破不全的，他聲稱(chēng)人們通常僅意識(shí)到自身的一部分而非全部。舉例而言，一位婦女可能不知道或不愿承認(rèn)她的行事方式有時(shí)和自己的母親很相像；一個(gè)成年男子或許不了解或不承認(rèn)他有時(shí)希望像嬰兒一樣哭喊。
The aim of getalt therapy is to help one to become whole -- to help the person become aware of, admit to, reclaim, and integrate his fragmented parts. Integration helps a person make the transition from dependency to self-sufficiency; from authoritarian outer support to authentic inner support.
格式塔心理學(xué)的目標(biāo)是幫助一個(gè)人走向完整 -- 幫助人們了解，接受，找回并重整其殘破的部分。重新整合幫助一個(gè)人從依賴(lài)轉(zhuǎn)向自給自足，從專(zhuān)斷的外部支持轉(zhuǎn)向真誠(chéng)的內(nèi)部支持。
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