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Claire WestwoodClaire Westwood
Level: Basic PLUS
Claire is a nurse, life coach, writer and Director of happynurses.co.uk. She is passionate about helping nurses to live happier, healthier lives and helping them ... ...
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www.Mingleverse.comNegotiation is an activity that lots of nurses, as well as others, can be fearful of. This could be because it feels like a 'competition' where no-one really wins. There is often some level of 'compromise' which means that no-one really comes out of the process with what they really want.
The best way to negotiate is with a win-win outcome in mind! Think of negotiation as collaboration, and always look for a solution where everyone is happy!
How do you do this?
Rapport
Start by establishing rapport. This does not mean simply asking how someone is, or what they did at the weekend (as some sales people try to do to 'force' friendly feelings) but begin to understand the process from their point of view.
Up-front Contract
Have an open and honest discussion and find out what you both want from the outcome. Establish an up-front-agreement so you both know why you are there, and what outcome you are looking for. Clarify exactly why you think you are both there, and the intention behind the meeting. Sometimes meetings are held when the other party has no intention of altering their course of action. Better to find this out before you waste lots of time. Look for areas of agreement, it could be more obvious than you think.
Really listen to each other closely, then confirm what you think they said:
"Let me make sure I understand....you would like.... (state what you think they would like)".
Keep Calm
If you feel attacked, keep cool and do not respond or get defensive. This takes practice but is very effective. Silence is a powerful tool. Restart the conversation with something neutral but respectful:
"I feel that you are not comfortable with this idea......perhaps you could expand on your thinking so that I can understand you better?"
Always use "I feel..." not "You should..." or anything else that may feel like accusing to the other person.
Options
Try out different options and see what is acceptable to everyone and what isn't. For example:
"If we got (x, y z) then would that be acceptable?"
Ask for their preferences and ideas. Then everyone involved has some feel for what the parameters are. This opens up a completely new way to come to an agreement. It has to be honest on both sides to work effectively.
Evidence
When proposing an idea, concentrate on a few strong reasons not a long list of weaker ones. Have some evidence to back-up your point of view. This will give you more confidence when discussing the details.
New Ways to Communicate
Always look for new ways of saying things, and keep the dialogue going. Take time to work out what it is that you BOTH want, this may lead to a solution that neither had considered. For example, you both want improved patient care for an efficient cost, or you both want your staff to be happier, and work more effectively. These similarities will help to direct the discussion towards win-win outcomes.
Reflect and clarify
Keep making sure you are really aware of what has been said:
"Let me be sure I understand where we are now."
Remember - they are human too!
Think 'collaboration' and 'win-win'. We are often on the same side when we take the time to look for similarities instead of differences.
Claire is a nurse, life coach, writer, speaker and Director of
http://www.happynurses.co.uk She is the author of 'The happynurses Guide to creating a Balanced Life - the 12 week coaching plan for busy nurses'
Nurses - for 21 free happiness tips and a weekly happynews ezine go to
http://www.happynurses.co.uk and sign up - join us!
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