| 你是否意識(shí)到這八種錯(cuò)誤的肢體語(yǔ)言 | 瀏覽：45 |
你是否意識(shí)到這八種錯(cuò)誤的肢體語(yǔ)言
Warning: Do You Recognize These 8 Body Language Killers?
相當(dāng)程度的交流是通過(guò)肢體語(yǔ)言實(shí)現(xiàn)的。雖然我們自己不能看見(jiàn)，但其他人可以。如果你在說(shuō)一件事的同時(shí)卻在想著另一件，你的肢體語(yǔ)言很可能會(huì)泄露你真正的想法。
- Gerri King, Ph.D.（一位杰出的企業(yè)顧問(wèn)，同時(shí)也是資深社會(huì)心理學(xué)家）
你知道嗎，在交流過(guò)程中，55%的信息是通過(guò)視覺(jué)傳達(dá)的（身體語(yǔ)言，眼神接觸），38%則是通過(guò)聲音（音調(diào)，語(yǔ)速，音量，語(yǔ)氣）。也就是說(shuō)，只有7%的信息是通過(guò)所說(shuō)的話傳達(dá)的?？梢?jiàn)，無(wú)論是一對(duì)一的面試或是面對(duì)一群人的簡(jiǎn)報(bào)，當(dāng)成為場(chǎng)上焦點(diǎn)時(shí)，你需要的是全面高效的溝通。
那么，如何更好地提升語(yǔ)言技能呢？
回避常見(jiàn)錯(cuò)誤，并以更自信的行為替代將明顯地提升你的肢體語(yǔ)言。這里列舉了八種會(huì)讓聽(tīng)眾失去興趣、或印像不深的肢體語(yǔ)言。訓(xùn)練自己去避免他們，你就會(huì)看到：小變化可以有大不同！
錯(cuò)誤#1 逃避眼神接觸
你是簡(jiǎn)單的念ppt而不是向觀眾介紹嗎？在一對(duì)一的談話中，你是盯著一旁、腳下或前面的桌子嗎？你從未看過(guò)聊天對(duì)象肩膀以上的部位嗎？這些都說(shuō)明你缺乏自信心，緊張和準(zhǔn)備不足。
技巧：看著你的聽(tīng)眾。用80%至90%的時(shí)間看著聽(tīng)眾的眼睛。絕大多數(shù)的人花太多
時(shí)間看筆記，幻燈片或身前的桌子，而很多人在看了自己的談話錄像后可以立刻改變這一行為。真正的商業(yè)領(lǐng)袖在傳遞信息時(shí)是直接看著聽(tīng)眾的眼睛的。
錯(cuò)誤#2 你和聽(tīng)眾之間有阻礙
另一種較常見(jiàn)的錯(cuò)誤是因?yàn)樵谀愫湍愕穆?tīng)眾之間有別的物體，從而阻礙了你們的直接交流。這些錯(cuò)誤，比如雙手交叉，站在講臺(tái)或椅子后，從屏幕后和別人交談，在都阻礙真正的交流。即使只是一個(gè)放在桌上的文件夾，也可能制造距離阻礙交流。
技巧：保持“開(kāi)放”。保持你的手打開(kāi)、手掌向上。消除你和你的聽(tīng)眾間的壁壘。
錯(cuò)誤#3 坐立不安，搖擺或晃動(dòng)
以上動(dòng)作說(shuō)明了你感到緊張，不確定或措手不及，避免這些錯(cuò)誤，因?yàn)檫@樣做并不能幫你實(shí)現(xiàn)什么。讓我們想象一下，一家電腦公司的高級(jí)業(yè)務(wù)主管要向他們的主要投資者傳遞新產(chǎn)品的訊息，但沒(méi)有成功。實(shí)際上，這個(gè)項(xiàng)目的確是在他團(tuán)隊(duì)的掌控下，但他的身體語(yǔ)言卻給了投資者其他的暗示。
做簡(jiǎn)報(bào)時(shí)前后搖晃，這就是這位主管的最大問(wèn)題。它反映了一種能力與控制力的缺乏。通過(guò)學(xué)習(xí)去做有意識(shí)的移動(dòng)，他最終避免了職業(yè)生涯上的失敗。下次簡(jiǎn)報(bào)之后，投資人定會(huì)相信一切都在他們的掌握中。
錯(cuò)誤#4 把手放在口袋中或手指糾纏
把手拘謹(jǐn)?shù)姆旁谏眢w兩側(cè)或塞在口袋里給人的印象是——你提不起興趣，不想?yún)⑴c或緊張，不論你到底是或不是。
解決它的辦法很簡(jiǎn)單：從口袋里拿出你的手，作些有決心的、果斷的手勢(shì)。保持兩手高于腰部是一個(gè)很好的例子。這是個(gè)復(fù)雜的手勢(shì)，反映了復(fù)雜的思想，并給了聽(tīng)眾對(duì)說(shuō)話人的信心。
錯(cuò)誤#5 站著、坐著不動(dòng)
效率低的發(fā)言者幾乎不動(dòng)，從頭到尾都站在同一個(gè)地方。這反映了他們很死板、緊
張、沉悶、沒(méi)有魅力和活力。
技巧：激活你的身體，而不是幻燈片，走動(dòng)走動(dòng)。大多數(shù)演講者都認(rèn)為他們需要筆直地站在一個(gè)地方。但他們不明白的是，移動(dòng)不僅是可接受的，而且是受歡迎的。
一些最偉大的商業(yè)演講者會(huì)走到觀眾中，并不停的走動(dòng)。但他們并非漫無(wú)目的。
舉例來(lái)說(shuō)，一個(gè)充滿活力的發(fā)言者將從房間的一邊走到另一邊去傳遞他們的信息。他指向幻燈片而不是閱讀它，他把手放在別人的肩膀上而不是與聽(tīng)眾保持距離。
錯(cuò)誤#6 沒(méi)精打采，后仰或駝背
這些姿態(tài)往往與缺乏自信聯(lián)系起來(lái)，它們能體現(xiàn)或者被認(rèn)為能體現(xiàn)——缺乏投入或興趣，它們也說(shuō)明你沒(méi)有權(quán)威，缺乏信心。
小技巧：保持抬頭挺胸。當(dāng)站立時(shí)，腳打開(kāi)與肩同寬，身體稍向前傾。這樣你就看起來(lái)很感興趣，更投入，更有熱情。肩膀略向前，這會(huì)顯得你更有男子氣概。頭與身體要直立，不要靠在桌子或講臺(tái)上。
錯(cuò)誤#7 虛假的動(dòng)作
這正表明你準(zhǔn)備過(guò)度，不自然和做作。要使用手勢(shì)，但別過(guò)度。研究人員已經(jīng)證明，手勢(shì)反映了復(fù)雜的思想。聽(tīng)眾能從手勢(shì)中察覺(jué)到你的信心，能力與控制力?？墒且坏┠阍噲D模仿一個(gè)手勢(shì)，你可能會(huì)被認(rèn)為做作，就像一個(gè)三流的政客。
布什總統(tǒng)常常用與他所說(shuō)的話格格不入的手勢(shì)，好像他準(zhǔn)備過(guò)度，這像收看配錯(cuò)音的低成本電影。你可能不會(huì)像布什總統(tǒng)那樣受到廣泛的評(píng)論，但盡管如此，你也不想在會(huì)議過(guò)后遭到同事與朋友取笑。
錯(cuò)誤#8 玩硬幣，跺腳和其他令人討厭的小動(dòng)作
以上動(dòng)作只能體現(xiàn)你的緊張，不自信或?qū)?xì)節(jié)不夠關(guān)注。用一臺(tái)攝像機(jī)錄下自己的表現(xiàn)，再用挑剔的眼光去重看一遍。你是否發(fā)現(xiàn)了自己從未察覺(jué)過(guò)的那些令人討厭的小動(dòng)作？有位作家寫(xiě)了一本關(guān)于領(lǐng)導(dǎo)力的書(shū)，我曾去看過(guò)他對(duì)自身規(guī)劃的討論。在整個(gè)談話過(guò)程中，他不停地玩口袋里的硬幣。那天，他不但沒(méi)有賣掉很多書(shū)，而且在領(lǐng)導(dǎo)力方面也沒(méi)有得到高分。
緊張將體現(xiàn)在不停的跺腳，摸臉或抖腳上。一旦你明白自己的行為，你可以輕松地改正它。
有活力，有感染力的肢體語(yǔ)言會(huì)幫助你提升的演講的表現(xiàn)力，不管你是在面試，升職或擔(dān)任高管的過(guò)程中。所以改進(jìn)你的肢體語(yǔ)言，如同注意你說(shuō)話一樣去注意它，你的影響力將飆升！
Warning: Do You Recognize These 8 Body Language Killers?
“A significant amount of communication occurs through body language. Though we can’t see our own, everyone else does. If you’re saying one thing and thinking another, your body language may well give you away.”
- Gerri King, Ph.D.
Did you know that 55% of communication is visual (body language, eye contact) and 38% is vocal (pitch, speed, volume, tone of voice)? That means only 7% involves your actual words. And when the spotlight is on you — whether one-on-one in a job interview or when making a presentation to a large group — you need to communicate effectively on all levels.
But how do you develop better language skills?
When it comes to body language, simply avoiding the most common mistakes and replacing them with more confident movements will make a big difference. Here you will find eight body language killers that will leave your audience underwhelmed and unimpressed. Train yourself to avoid them, and you’ll see that simple changes can make all the difference.
Mistake #1. Avoiding eye contact.
Do you read directly from a PowerPoint presentation instead of addressing the audience? In a one-on-one conversation, do you glance to the side, down at your feet, or at the desk? Ever catch yourself looking over the shoulder of the person you’re talking to? What it says about you is that you lack confidence, you are nervous and unprepared.
The winning technique: Keeping your eyes on your audience. Spend 80% to 90% of the time looking into the eyes of your listeners. The vast majority of people spend far too much time looking down at notes, PowerPoint slides or at the table in front of them. Not surprisingly, most speakers can change this behavior instantly simply by watching video of themselves. Powerful business leaders look at their listeners directly in the eye when delivering their message.
Mistake #2. Blocking: putting something between you and your listeners.
Another common mistake is putting something between you and your listeners. Crossing your arms, standing behind a podium or chair, or talking to someone from behind a computer monitor are all examples of blocking, which prevents a real connection from taking place. Even a folder on a desk can break the connection and create distance.
The winning technique: Staying “open.” Keep your hands apart and your palms up, pointed toward the ceiling. Remove physical barriers between you and your listeners.
Mistake #3. Fidgeting, rocking or swaying.
What it says about you is that you’re nervous, unsure or unprepared. So, stop fidgeting. Fidgeting, rocking and swaying don’t serve any purpose. Let’s imagine for a second a top executive of a computer company who has to deliver the news of a product delay to a major investor. He and his team actually have the event under control, and they have learned valuable lessons from their failure. But his body language suggests otherwise.
His biggest problem is rocking back and forth as he delivers the presentation. It reflects a lack of competence and control. By eventually learning to move with purpose, he can avoid career suicide. The investor will leave the next presentation confident that the project is well under control.
Mistake #4. Keeping your hands in your pockets or clasped together.
Keeping your hands stiffly by your side or stuck in your pockets can give the impression that you’re uninterested, uncommitted or nervous — whether you are or not.
The solution here is too simple: Take your hands out of your pocket and use them for purposeful, assertive hand gestures. Engaging both hands above the waist is an example of a complex hand gesture that reflects complex thinking and gives the listener confidence in the speaker.
Mistake #5. Standing or sitting perfectly still.
Ineffective speakers barely move, staying in one spot during a presentation. What it says about them: They are rigid, nervous, boring — not engaging or dynamic.
The winning technique: Animate your body, not your slides. Walk. Move. Most speakers think they need to stand ridged in one place. What they don’t realize is that movement is not only acceptable, it’s welcome. Some of the greatest business speakers walk into the audience, and are constantly moving… but with purpose!
For example, a dynamic speaker will walk from one side of the room to another to deliver their message. He points to a slide instead of reading from it, places his hand on someone’s shoulders instead of keeping the distance.
Mistake #6. Slouching, leaning back, or being hunched over.
Poor posture is often associated with a lack of confidence and can reflect — or be presumed to reflect — a lack of engagement or interest. What it says about you: You are unauthoritative; you lack confidence.
The winning technique: Keeping your head up and back straight. When standing stationary, place feet at shoulder width and lean slightly forward — you will look far more interested, engaged, and enthusiastic. Pull your shoulders slightly forward as well — you’ll appear more masculine. Head and spine should be straight. Don’t use a tabletop or podium as an excuse to lean on it.
Mistake #7. Using phony gestures.
What it says about you is that you’re overcoached, unnatural or artificial. Use gestures; just don’t overdo it. Researchers have shown that gestures reflect complex thought. Gestures leave listeners with the perception of confidence, competence and control. But the minute you try to copy a hand gesture, you risk looking contrived — like a bad politician.
President George Bush Sr. used gestures that were often incongruous with his words, as if he had been overcoached. It was like watching mismatched audio in a bad B-movie. You may not command quite as wide an audience as President Bush did, but, nonetheless, the last thing you want is for your own colleagues and friends to make fun of you after a meeting.
Mistake #8. Jingling coins, tapping toes & other annoying movements.
What it says about you is that you’re nervous, unpolished or insufficiently concerned with details. Use a video camera to tape yourself. Play it back with a critical eye. Do you find annoying gestures that you weren’t aware of? I once watched an author who had written a book on leadership discuss his project. He couldn’t help but jingle all the coins in his pocket throughout the entire talk. He didn’t sell very many books that day, and he certainly didn’t score points on the leadership scale.
Nervous energy will reflect itself in toe-tapping, touching your face or moving your leg up and down. It’s an easy fix once you catch yourself in the act!
Dynamic and powerful body language will help you kick up the power of your presentations, whether you’re interviewing for a job, climbing the career ladder or occupying the corner office. So work on your body language. Pay as much attention to it as the words you use, and watch your influence soar!
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